Before I get to today’s blog post, I want to announce the release of the 2nd Edition of my book “Silencing Your Inner Saboteur”. See the “Books” page or Click Here for information on availability of both paperback and ebook editions. I will have paperback copies with me at When Words Collide in Calgary.
And now we return to our regularly scheduled blog!
We’ve been talking a fair bit about setting goals, making sure they are achievable and exceedable, and pursuing our dreams. But what happens when events occur that are out of our control and change everything on us? Or as I like to call it, when life throws us a curve ball?
When I first began looking for work after high-school, it was popular for interviewers to ask me where I saw myself in 5 years. I learned to answer with what was expected, an answer of career advancement and loyalty within the company. But inside I wondered “How should I know?” After my first year of University I decided to drop out for a while. Less than two years later I was going back to University part-time, I’d developed severe Carpal Tunnel Syndrome and was pretty much unable to work because I could use my hands. It seemed like every time I planned to go in one direction, a brick wall popped up and I had to change my plans. I could barely plan for one year ahead, never mind 5 years.
And even now, we can make all the goals we want, but frequently, the final achievement of the grand plan is out of our control. We can do everything in our power to make it happen and convince the person whose decision it is, but in the end, we still cannot control them.
So what do we do when something beyond our control makes our goals no longer possible?
The first thing we must do is recognize that Change is Inevitable. This is one of the founding principles of my practice as a Coach.
When unexpected change happens, it can be painful. Take some time to mourn the loss of your dream. Look ahead in the new direction and see what new possibilities are ahead. Lean on your support system to help you, and hire a coach to help you navigate the new direction and goals.
Have you ever been thrown a curve-ball? How did you deal with the change?
Definitely have been thrown a curve ball. With Nathan being sick and unable to work, I was stuck supporting us, and we had no money for anything. It felt like there was no point in dreaming about anything, because we’d never be able to do it. And even when we finally got the insurance settlement, we kind of sat there and looked at all that money, thinking, okay, if we buy a house, it’s still not enough to get us anything but a one bedroom shanty in the north end. We had to figure out something to do with it that wasn’t going to be essentially just throwing the money away. But I’d failed calculus in university, so the sciences was just never going to be a choice for a career for me if we used it to send me back to university. And I couldn’t bring myself to use it on a university degree that I had no passion for, and the things I had passion for were not likely to increase my income in any reliable way. It took me a year to figure out what to do with it. 😛